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yourdarklordsatan:

gingerhaze:

you know when you accidentally fall asleep for an hour without meaning to

and then you wake up and everything feels ever so slightly off, like you woke up in an alternate dimension?

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beantownbailout:

mustaleski:

matildathedragonfly:

knownorwegian:

In Norwegian, you don’t refer to your romantic partner as a “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”. You say “kjæreste”, which is gender neutral and literally translates to “the dearest”.

and in swedish you refer to your boyfriend/girlfriend by saying ”älskling” which translates into ”my beloved one” 

And in Finnish we say “mulkvisti” which means “one I don’t hate as much as the others”

*squints at finland*

magicconchshell:

the sims 4 should be in 3D and i want more graphic woohooing because i know damn well babies dont come from 2 sims moving around under the covers and some fucking rose petals falling from the sky no

englandsbooty:

even People magazine made Shrek jokes

omgfrankiero:

IM DYING BECAUSE I CHANGED MY DASHBOARD THEME TO THIS PICTURE OF BILLY RAY CYRUS AND THEN THIS HAPPENED

OH MY GOD NO BILLY RAY THAT PIZZA IS NOT FOR YOU

phlynn:

remember when people choked on cinnamon to entertain the internet

eggplantsplit:

spectromagiic:

djpaige:

But srsly though

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If you ever find yourself in a Disney movie

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And someone or something starts being mysteriously surrounded by lime green

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Stay away from the thing

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Everything lime green is evil

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Just remember that.

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Everything lime green is evil.

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axispowershentai:

softdespair:

join-they-said:

Russian medical record written in cursive

you say russian and i raise you chinese

Chinese doctors' handwriting

we gotta be a sherlock to solve the handwritten mystery

….oh my fucking god—

mothERFUCKING COMMUNISTS, MAN

I sleep with your old shirts
And walk through this house in your shoes
I know it’s strange
It’s a strange way of saying that I know I’m supposed to love you
I’m supposed to love you

bootslots:

time-for-maps:

Map of the Internet. [4829 × 3207]

this is hella cool but then

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hi tumblr

wait

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is that

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hell yeah

votlendi:

i did sort of?? zombie-apocalypse comic book doodles

i did kenny and cartman too but i dont like them as much as these two

wanderoar:

roseonabeach:

frostedsammy:

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, “Can you all see me now?”

“Yes.”
“Oui.”
“Sí.”
“Ja.”

what

Took me about ten minutes to finally understand this

stupidest/most awesome joke ever

fight-0ff-yourdem0ns:

I just wanna have abs…olutely all the pasta and breadsticks

punk2007:

(in the 1600’s) you gotta carrier pigeon?

joostz9:

I kind of find it hard to believe that no one else in the kingdom had Cinderella’s shoe size.

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